Mall Santa Beats Child Molester-Fiction!
Summary of eRumor:
A mall Santa beat a child molester after a little girl confided in him that her stepfather had been touching her at night.
A fake news website is behind false reports that a mall Santa Claus beat a child molester after a little girl said “all she wanted was for her stepdad to stop touching her at night.”
The story appeared at ThugLife, a fake news website that states on its About Us page that it sometimes shares “odd satire stories” for its readers’ entertainment.
The story appeared under the headline, “Kid Tells Mall Santa a Secret; Seconds Later Him and His Elves Are Beating Up Child Molester,” and it has been shared nearly 200,000 times on social media:
66 year-old Nicholas Cooper was taken into custody for assaulting Kris Kane, 38, after an unnamed young girl confided in him. She said that she ‘wanted to tell Santa a secret’ and that ‘all she wanted was for her stepdad to stop touching her at night’.
Kane was waiting by the side of the Southridge grottos for his stepdaughter to finish talking to Santa. And when he saw the fake bearded and red suited Cooper come towards him, he thought he was in for a chat about what gifts she wanted… But he couldn’t have been more wrong.
“Santa didn’t say nothing. He just grabbed the back of the guy’s skull and headbutted him REAL hard,” an eyewitness said. “Then Kringle got on top of him and just started pummeling him. He was laughing ans screaming ‘Ho! Ho! Ho! Motherf*cker!’ over and over again. It was damn surreal.”
The witness goes on: “That ain’t even the damnedest thing, though. While Santa’s punching the cr*p out of this guy, three or four of his little elves ran over and started kicking him. I mean, they’ve only got little legs – but they were aiming for his head. He was NOT left feeling very festive after that!”
The ThugLife reported that the mall Santa beating took place at Southridge Mall in Greendale, Wisconsin, but we couldn’t find any credible local reports about the incident. Also, no criminal charges have been brought against anyone named “Kris Kane” with sexual assault of a child, according to online court records.
Given all that, we’re calling this one “fiction.”