Woman Held Hostage by Pillsbury Biscuit-Fiction!
Summary of eRumor:
A woman is discovered sitting in her car in a grocery store parking lot with her hands held behind her head. A customer asks the woman if she’s okay. She says that she’s been shot in the back of the head and has been sitting there for more than an hour holding her hands over the wound to keep her brains from falling out. Paramedics are called and they discover that what she thought was her brain is actually a huge wad of bread dough. They finally figure out that when she got into the driver’s seat, a Pillsbury Biscuit can exploded from the groceries she had placed in the back seat and between the sound of the explosion and the sensation of something hitting her head, she thought she had been shot and also thought the dough was her brains falling out.
It was not published by the Associated Press and anyone with a news background can tell it is not written by a professional journalist.
For one thing, there is no location mentioned…a “must” for a legitimate news story.
There are some versions that mention the parking lot of a particular store and at least one version that says this happened in San Diego, but none of them has ever turned out to be true.
WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (The actual AP headline)
Linda Burnett, 23, was visiting her in-laws, and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head.
One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda’s eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she’d been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.
The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head.
A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour. And, yes, Linda is a blonde.